A demanding person, I am.

I believe that everyone has different ways of expressing themselves, of giving others their special attention. I also believe that people have different expectations of what they need from others and how others should behave. But what I know for sure is that when one is in need of his or her most important persons to care about them, he or she will become the most possessive person alive and definitely demands the fullest attention from them. I sometimes wonder why that simple logic is not always applicable, sometimes even to those who are so close, or even those who are long term lovers.

I really don't understand why I have to tell my loved one over and over again about my feeling, and how depressed I am, just to have his slightest attention, just to know the fact that he still doesn't provide that. I sometimes cannot understand why can't he be emphatic for a while, and not say any single word, and just hold me, or at least just leave me alone. I really don't ask him to ask me if I am okay or not, because I know that he knows that I am not. I also don't ask him to keep me busy or ask me out, because I know that he knows that I don't feel like meeting people or going out when I am down. And the fact that he doesn't talk to me, or prefers to listening to music, or to go to cafe for coffee, don't help me in anyway except making me feel like crying.

-----------------------------------

Latest Update:
Hmm, yeah, I really believe that everyone has different ways of giving attention. He is just back with my favorite perfume, and said plainly, "Nih, tadi ada parfum ini di bijenkorf, gue inget lo nyari-nyari ini, jadi gue beliin!".